Happy Monday!!! Hope ya’ll had an awesome weekend. I’m taking a week off from Must Have Mondays to do a little gushing. Yesterday my hubby and I celebrated our 12 year wedding anniversary. Hard to believe. We were total babes(and I don’t mean we were hot…like babies. We were babies) when we got married.
I’ve known him since the 7th grade. Since before his voice changed. I knew him when he got his first car, his first kiss(NOT from me), and went to his first prom. I bought him his first pair of “cool jeans.” Thanks to me the pleated Gap jean was no more. We used to ride around in his jeep together during the summer’s eating TCBY(does that even still exist? I’m sorry but it should….it was the best yogurt ever). We have a ton of history together. I get that this ins’t common. But it’s our story and I wouldn’t change a thing…..
This is when our first son, Jake, was born. Gosh, we were so young and stupid then
We were 22 here….and my eyes look CRAZY…but notice how few bags I have under them? That my friends is youth.
He was my best friend then, and he’s my best friend now. I know this sounds cheesy and ridiculous, I mean, this is a running blog after all. It’s also my life, and he is my whole life. I just think it’s important you know this about me. There is so much involved in marriage. It’s HARD. It’s not just some fairy tale that requires us to simply sit by and watch and enjoy. It takes work. Effort. Forgiveness. Selflessness. Communication. Sacrifice. Stuff that we don’t always want to give.
To be perfectly honest with you…we spent he majority of our anniversary weekend arguing…over silly stuff. Then, last night at dinner we spent time laughing about how ridiculous we had been acting. We sat and talked about everything under the sun for a good 3 hours.
I’m not here to lecture or brag. Our life, our marriage isn’t perfect. No one’s is. We argue, we disagree, we fight. It’s two imperfect people building life together. It’s hard. But, it’s worth investing in. It’s worth working for. It’s worth sacrificing for.
We got married at the ripe old age of 20. Seriously, it’s crazy. But, God knew exactly what He was doing. We are extremely thankful He did because we didn’t have a clue. We’ve learned a few things over the years and we have so far to go and so much more life to experience and wisdom to gain. I thought I’d pass along 2 things we have started doing over the years that have helped us grow closer together…..
* Have a regular date night. This one is huge. I get it. Babysitters are expensive these days. We happen to be super blessed because our babysitter lives behind us and we know her and her family. My kids LOVE her. It’s worth every penny for us to go out…ALONE. Sometimes, we need to just put the money into paying a babysitter and spend less on dinner or going out. I could sit at McDonald’s with a $1 coffee and talk and be totally happy. It doesn’t have to be expensive. The point is un-interrupted time together. There are a lot of options out there for parents…do some digging and make it happen people.
* Find something you enjoy doing together and go do it. I know this sounds similar to the first but it’s slightly different. This involves hobbies. Find some common interests and go have fun doing them. Music/Concerts, museums, hiking, running, movies, travel etc. Find something you both enjoy and go do it together. This has been something that has changed our whole relationship. Don’t be afraid to leave your kids. They will be better for it..promise.
Rob took me to Colorado Springs for my #30th birthday. We hiked Pikes Peak and this was at the top. That trip was life changing for us. It’s when we decided that we would make the financial investment in our marriage to take trips together. This year we ran a marathon in March in Napa and will be going to Portland in a few weeks for Hood to Coast. It doesn’t always have to be an expensive getaway..but GET AWAY. It builds on that friendship aspect of your marriage and it is so entirely worth it.
Ok, so I’m jumping off my soap box today and I promise running stuff will resume tomorrow. But, I’m kind of passionate about seeing marriages thrive and be successful. So, if you are married and reading this, keep pressing forward and doing whatever you need to do to thrive. I know it’s hard but keep pressing on friends. It’s worth the work.
What have you found helpful in building healthy marriages?